7 Reasons Why Therapy Isn’t Working and What to Do Now
Therapy can be a powerful tool for healing, but what happens when it doesn’t seem to be helping? If you’re feeling stuck or frustrated because therapy isn’t working as expected, you’re not alone. Many people face this challenge, but there are ways to get back on track. Let’s dive into the top reasons why therapy might not be working for you and what you can do about it.
1. You Don’t Feel Connected to Your Therapist
Why It Matters: The relationship between you and your therapist is crucial. If you don’t feel safe, understood, or respected, it’s hard to open up and make progress. Therapy is about trust and connection, and without that, it can feel like you’re just going through the motions.
What to Do: Don’t be afraid to speak up. Let your therapist know how you’re feeling. Sometimes, talking about the disconnect can actually bring you closer. If it still doesn’t feel right, it’s okay to look for a new therapist who’s a better fit. Remember, it’s your journey, and you deserve someone who gets you.
2. You’re Not Sure What You Want from Therapy
Why It Matters: Going to therapy without clear goals can make it feel like you’re wandering without direction. You might leave sessions wondering what you accomplished or feeling like nothing’s changing. It’s like going on a road trip without knowing the destination—you need a map!
What to Do: Take some time to think about what you want to get out of therapy. Are you looking for specific tools to handle anxiety, or do you want to dig into past traumas? Share your goals with your therapist so you can both work towards them. If you’re not sure, your therapist can help you figure it out.
3. You’re Not Being Completely Honest
Why It Matters: Therapy works best when you’re open and honest. But sometimes, it’s hard to talk about painful things, or you might worry about being judged. Holding back means your therapist doesn’t have the full picture, which makes it harder to help you.
What to Do: Try to be as honest as possible. Remember, your therapist is there to help, not judge. It might feel scary, but sharing your true thoughts and feelings is a brave step towards healing. If there’s something you’re struggling to talk about, let your therapist know—it’s a good starting point.
4. Not Putting in the Work Outside of Sessions
Why It Matters: Therapy isn’t just about what happens during your session; it’s also about applying what you learn to your daily life. If you’re not taking steps outside of therapy, like practicing coping skills or reflecting on your discussions, it can feel like you’re not moving forward.
What to Do: Commit to making small changes between sessions. This might be journaling, doing homework your therapist gives you, or practicing new behaviors. Growth happens little by little, and the more you engage outside of sessions, the more progress you’ll see.
5. Expecting Quick Fixes
Why It Matters: It’s easy to hope that therapy will be a quick solution, but real change takes time. Healing is a journey with ups and downs, and sometimes it can feel slow or frustrating. Expecting immediate results can lead to disappointment and make you want to give up.
What to Do: Be patient with yourself and the process. Celebrate small wins along the way, like making it through a tough week or having an honest conversation in therapy. Progress is progress, no matter how small. Trust that with time, things can get better.
6. Your Therapy Approach Might Not Be the Right Fit
Why It Matters: There are many types of therapy, like cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), psychodynamic therapy, or mindfulness-based therapy. If the approach your therapist is using doesn’t resonate with you, it might feel like you’re not getting anywhere.
What to Do: Talk to your therapist about the methods they’re using. If it doesn’t feel right, ask about trying a different approach or technique. Sometimes, switching to a new style of therapy can make all the difference. It’s about finding what clicks for you.
7. Outside Factors Are Getting in the Way
Why It Matters: Life outside of therapy can impact how much you’re able to focus and work on yourself. Stress from work, family issues, financial worries, or health problems can all affect your progress in therapy.
What to Do: Be open with your therapist about what’s going on in your life. They can help you navigate these challenges and adjust your sessions to better support you during tough times. It’s okay if progress slows down; what’s important is that you keep showing up for yourself.
What to Do When Therapy Isn’t Working
If you’ve read through these reasons and feel like some of them apply to you, don’t lose hope! Therapy is a personal journey, and it’s normal to hit bumps along the way. Here are some steps to help you get back on track:
Communicate with Your Therapist: Be honest about how you’re feeling. Whether it’s about the approach, the pace, or the connection, sharing your concerns is the first step to making things better.
Set Clear Goals: Work with your therapist to set specific, achievable goals. Knowing what you’re working towards can help sessions feel more productive and focused.
Stay Engaged: Therapy is a partnership. The more effort you put in, both in and out of sessions, the more you’ll get out of it. Try to stay engaged, even when it’s hard.
Be Patient: Change takes time, and sometimes it’s two steps forward, one step back. Be gentle with yourself and remember that healing isn’t a straight line.
Consider a Change: If you’ve tried to make things work and it still doesn’t feel right, it might be time to consider a different therapist or approach. It’s okay to move on and find something that fits you better.
Final Thoughts
Therapy is a journey, and like any journey, it’s filled with twists and turns. If it’s not working for you right now, that doesn’t mean it won’t ever work. By taking these steps and staying open to the process, you can find a path that leads to the healing and growth you’re looking for. Remember, you deserve to feel better, and with the right support, it’s possible. Keep going—you’ve got this!
Start Therapy Near You in Chicago and Illinois
At Mindful Healing Counseling, we understand the challenges that life can bring. That's why our team comprises several therapists specialized in working with a variety of concerns and offering online counseling services to individuals living in Chicago and throughout Illinois.
Our therapists are experienced and trained in working with people dealing with various concerns such as anxiety, trauma, depression, pregnancy and postpartum concerns, relationship difficulties, life transitions, setting boundaries, managing family dynamics, navigating grief, and more. We prioritize providing affirming spaces for BIPOC and LGBTQ+ individuals. We offer therapy near you through a range of evidence-based treatments including Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), mindfulness-based approaches, relational therapy, and more. Our services extend to adults of all ages, as well as teens, college students, couples, and families.
Reach out to us today. You can contact us by filling out our contact form or by calling or texting us at 708-419-3171. We're here to support you every step of the way.
